Home » » The 20 Ugliest Goalkeeper Jerseys in History, Part III: The Uhlsport Years

The 20 Ugliest Goalkeeper Jerseys in History, Part III: The Uhlsport Years

Written By Justin on Wednesday, February 9, 2011 | 1:27:00 PM

Uhlsport is one of the kings of the goalkeeping world. Along with Reusch, they have been producing top quality gloves, jerseys, and training equipment for over five decades. In the 1980s they produced a slew of iconic jerseys, but something happened in the period between 1992 and 1995: collectively, they completely lost their minds. The funny thing about Uhlsport in this period is how gorgeous so many of their gloves are. Beautiful gloves, ugly jerseys. Here are but five selections from this period. Trust me, I could have included many more.

First up is this thing, being modeled by Uwe Kamps. Although I'm sure we will all agree that by itself it is absurd, the matching shorts bring it to a new level of hilarity. The gloves are beautiful. The jersey? Wars have been started over less.

Next we have former Real Madrid goalkeeper Paco Buyo, modeling what looks to be a piece of hotel art on his chest.

Double your pleasure, double your fun.

Congratulations, you are about to view the single greatest picture in history. Are you ready? Here you go:

Finally, it is difficult to express the sheer level of awesome of this jersey. It might not be as obviously awful as the geometric nightmares above, but just look at it. Click on it to enlarge, and really look at it: the quilting, the patterns, the colors, the fact that the model is wearing it inside an ice cave. And his subtle smirk and sublime raised eyebrows, which say, "Oh yes indeed, I'm wearing this. I'm wearing the hell out of it." This, friends, is my favorite ugly jersey of all time.

I have limited myself to twenty in this series, which means there are only five more to go. I have found far more than twenty, but we have to move on to more serious pursuits. Eventually.


Thanks to theglovebag.com for all pictures


Anonymous said...

Is that last one you, Grimmers?

Justin said...

Haha NO, it's not me. I wish.

Marino said...

I can actually remember wanting Paco's jersey in the 80s. So cool, so state of the art, so ugly!!!! I stand here with my head hung in shame.

chris said...

Excellent series! Very funny.

Though I think you should consider some of the short-sleeved jerseys as well.

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